Start at the top whatever stage you are at — the first section is ten minutes of conversation with the bride, and skipping it is how most bachelorette weekends go wrong.
1First: ask the bride
- Who has to be there? (Her list, not yours)
- Roughly what should it cost people?
- Anything she would hate?
- Does she want to know the plan, or be surprised?
- Any two people who should not share a room?
24–6 months out
- Build the guest list; collect emails and numbers
- Poll 3–5 weekends, all at least three weeks clear of the wedding
- Set a deadline for the poll and hold it
- Introduce the group to each other in one thread
33–4 months out
- Fix the destination
- Send the full cost, once, before anyone books (including the bride's share if the group is covering it)
- Offer a one-night or Saturday-only option
- Book accommodation
- Collect deposits immediately
41–2 months out
- Book the Saturday dinner
- Book the activity; keep the expensive one optional and separately priced
- Assign jobs: decorations, playlist, cake, transfers, photos
- Share the outline itinerary — no surprise 9am starts
5The week before
- One message: address, arrival times, what to bring, dress code, what is owed
- Chase outstanding money now
- Confirm every booking
- Create the shared photo album
- Plan for anyone who is not drinking
6The weekend
- Something structured early, so strangers have a task, not small talk
- Do not seat by friendship group at dinner
- Group photo while everyone is present and presentable
- Photos into the album on the last night
- Settle up before people leave
Worth knowing
- State the full number once. A cost revealed in instalments is the single most common source of resentment.
- Never poll the group on budget — the answer skews high because nobody wants to say a low number. Set it from the bride's steer.
- Watch the in-jokes. The dominant sub-group sets the tone without meaning to.
- Build in downtime. A relentless schedule is hardest on the people who are also meeting eight strangers.
Common questions.
When should you start planning a bachelorette party?
Four to six months before the wedding. The planning itself does not take that long, but getting a date agreed across a group drawn from several friendship circles does, and the weekend needs to land at least three weeks clear of the wedding.
Who pays for the bride?
Usually the group splits her share of accommodation and the main activity. It is a convention, not a rule — decide it with her, then put it in the first message with the total cost so nobody discovers it as a surprise line at the end.
What if guests have very different budgets?
Keep the core weekend affordable, make the expensive activity optional and separately priced, and offer a one-night option. Say so unprompted; very few people will ask. A weekend of ten where three skip the expensive bit beats a weekend of six.
Can I copy this checklist?
Yes. The Copy button puts it on your clipboard as markdown with tick boxes, so it pastes into Notes, Notion or the group chat. Free, no account.
Why the list is in this order.
How to plan a bachelorette party
A realistic timeline for planning a bachelorette or hen party — guest list, budget, dates and the money conversation nobody wants to have.
A checklist that fills itself in.
Kinora keeps this list live for the whole group — every job shows who owns it, the date poll closes the date, the budget tracks who has paid. Free while the beta runs.